Filthy Idahoans Will Be On Display On This Upcoming National Day

June will once again kick off soon with what has got to be the filthiest national day of all. I wish any Idahoan who decides to take part in the United States celebration one week from today the worst case of foot fungus known to man, because you would have earned it.

National Go Barefoot Day is Thursday, June 1. The thought of spending an entire day with bare feet on the ground in Idaho really ramps up my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. I'm also a germophobe, so you can understand why this idea makes me ill.

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If I were in Turks and Caicos, maybe I might celebrate this grossest of all national U.S. days. Turks and Caicos is British owned, so it wouldn't make sense to do it; I guess I'm off the hook on that one.

Do people actually do this in America? What is this...1966? Flip-flops are like $3.00. Your average homeless person can scrounge that up in 30 minutes.

What's so liberating about going barefoot in this day and age? Needles, dog crap, vomit, human feces (if you're in San Francisco), broken glass, and roadkill are just a few things a human can step on in an average day. Tracking this into your own home isn't a great idea either.

I urge those in Idaho to show some common sense on June 1 and keep those feet covered. Also, most people's feet are just ugly, so that's yet another reason to keep them concealed with socks and shoes.