In just a few days, a large number of Idahoans will again don silly green hats and pulsating, battery-powered necklaces while throwing back beer tainted with green dye and ordering a dish of salt-cured meat that they really don't care for. Saint Patrick's Day is once again looming in the Gem State, and I could care less because I'm Italian.

I'd be lying to you if I claimed to have never gone through the motions that come with the arrival of St. Patrick's Day on American soil. I've never celebrated the holiday, but I am guilty of acknowledging it. March 17 is one week from Friday.

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As far back as high school, my friends and I would converge on a local bar with fake identification wearing shirts with clovers on them and ordering Irish Car Bombs, but it was never a calendar date I particularly cared about. Nothing against the Irish, but I've always considered taking part in non-American cultural celebrations as sort of dumb. I didn't grow up knocking pinatas off of tree branches or pounding steins of terrible dark beer in October either.

Even though a recent DNA origin search by the fine folks at informed me that I'm 5% Irish, I've never felt Irish. I'm half Italian, and I still have relatives that live in the mountains of central Italy that can be traced.

In a 2022 survey by, Idaho was identified as the thirty-fifth most Irish state in the country. To present this data in an easier way to understand, there are hardly any people that have Irish blood pumping through their veins that are presently living in Idaho. You'd have to pretty much live on the East Coast to feel comfortable in your own skin celebrating Saint Patrick's Day in the U.S.

While we're on the subject, pouring green dye into beer not only tastes like crap, but it's a waste of a perfectly good beer. Happy St. Patty's Day you guys!

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