Commentary: Merlin Smedley Battles the Bunnies
Merlin Smedley is putting rabbits on notice. The Mayor of Burley, Idaho presides over a city where a recent battle over backyard chickens split the community. Now he wants the bunnies busted and bused out of town. The details of the story are reported at this link by the Magic Valley Times New. Aside from being in the back of the line when names were being handed out the Mayor also believes rabbits are farm animals. He’s threatening a veto if his city council goes ahead with plans to grant a waiver for the bunnies being housed at the local school as part of a 4-H educational program. It’s my guess Merlin’s magic would also apply to all pet rabbits people may keep at home and the potentially thousands of wild rabbits ravishing radishes in local gardens.
The Mayor insists he’s going to the school to inspect the bunny barn and will next week have a final decision about the mortal threat posed by the fuzzy little creatures, although. While Burley is called a city with a population of just over ten-thousand it much more resembles a small town. A bunny at the school could pose a hazard to residents in neighborhoods all across Mayor Merlin’s domain. While not known for barking, braying or crowing we’ve all seen the dangers rabbits can pose. Just ask Yosemite Sam, the Tasmanian Devil and Marvin-the-Martian. Docile little animals can be very clever.
I think the greatest fear is the potential for home invasions. You could be sound asleep at 2:00 o’clock in the morning in beautiful downtown Burley when a bevy of bunnies bash down your door. They could assault you in bed, raid your refrigerator for the salad greens and then pee on your floor. I’m concerned, frightened and befuddled and I don’t even live in Burley.
This must be a proud moment for Burley and all of Cassia County. Merlin Smedley is on the job and vows nothing will stop him from ridding the rabbits. With so many communities across Idaho wasting time on infrastructure, closing meth labs and attempts to maintain fragile economies isn’t it great knowing there are still brave men willing to tackle the truly serious issues?