Opinion: Portland Needs Some Apocalypse Now

I’m brainstorming ideas for ending the outbreak of urban riots.  Sunday morning, I crawled out of bed to the news four cities had major civil unrest overnight.  At some point this becomes the new normal or somebody takes action.  I got to thinking about a scene from one of the great movie masterpieces from the last century.

Francis Ford Coppola’s Apocalypse Now features an attack scene for the ages.  The air cavalry goes roaring into a Viet Cong controlled village with Wagner blaring over speakers and raining down destruction with rockets and some very large caliber guns.

While I don’t recommend missiles and automatic fire, I do believe a similar approach with music and quick landings could corral many of the street urchins burning down cities.  They wouldn’t know how to respond.  Many would simply run and the rest could be rounded up in the confusion.  A few days in the slammer, heavy fines and the possibility of serious prison time would likely show some true colors.  Behavior modification!  Because, apparently nobody ever told these spoiled kids, “No!”

This would be a valuable and lifelong lesson.  You want people to follow the law?  Show some teeth.  Otherwise, this is only going to metastasize.

I believe a great many Americans would support rounding up the urchins like you would a herd of wild horses.  Most people at the current moment are simply too fearful of saying what they’re thinking.

Anyhow, spare the rod, spoil the child.  A good swift paddling could put the President’s re-election chances back into the pole position.