How Idaho Guys Can Impress Girls on Valentine’s Day

I’ve got to thank the liberal writer who told me I could skip the flowers!  An opinion piece in Pravda-on-the-Potomac, sometimes known as the Washington Post, says Valentine’s Day flowers are killing the planet.  Not sure you can get beyond the paywall, but there’s some great advice on how you can tell the love of your life you care.  Just explain over a vegetarian dinner that you love her so much, that you want her to live on a cooler planet.  It should do wonders for your future together.

She’ll think so much more of you for being a good steward of the planet!

You see, roses and other flowers are grown all over the planet.  The demand is so great that we jet them across oceans.  The story says four out of five roses sold in the United States come from two countries in South America.  These need to be refrigerated and quickly flown to cities here, then kept cool until delivered.  One bouquet spews tons of CO2 into the air.  The writer suggests snapdragons (grown domestically) are better options.

I’m reminded of the time as a little boy when I picked my mom's dandelions.  It was the thought that counted, even if she wasn’t impressed.

I suppose chocolate is out.  It’s harvested by people in poor countries working often in terrible conditions and they don’t have a union.  Plus, you’ll then need to buy her a treadmill!

Let me recommend an alternative.  Beer.  I hear the feminine side prefers Bud Light.  I also hear the suds are good with pizza.  If she can’t polish off a 12-pack, offer to help.  Then stay home and save some fossil fuel by watching a good ballgame.  By the way, Sweetie, can you pass the remote?

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